Sunday, Sunday

I have NO idea why there was so much friggin blank space in my last post.

My mood is better today. I guess Chris felt bad for being an ass yesterday, because he took me out to breakfast this morning, then we went to IKEA. I only spent $70 on stuff that I really *didn't* need, but it was such a good price........

Tomorrow is the startof Vacation Bible School. I went and set up my room.....I am the Critter Craft lady;-) Joseph was hoping to just be a crew leader but Karla decided she needs him in the Bible Story room. He is dramatic, after all;P

The youth group kids pretty much finalized what they will be singing/playing for the dinner/concert in August. They are doing Let It Be........Joseph is jazzed about that, cause he gets to do the guitar solo. Besides.....Fr. Mike loves the Beatles, and especially likes Let It Be, so it will be a good thing to perform. Gotta keep the priest happy....especially when he is normally a grump;) Whoever speaks about happy go lucky Irish priests has never met Fr. Mike.

With that said.....I have to get up early, and I really should be in bed.....

Joseph and I got home this afternoon from Tahoe. Chris got home last night from Illinois. He called me this morning bitching because the old washer is still out by the garage. No one has come and hauled it away yet. And that, of course, is my fault:/ I should magically have someone appear and haul it away. No matter that I called the freaking guy and he was supposed to come yesterday. The frikkin check is still in the envelope taped to the washer. But its my fault:/

Its amazing. I spend a few days in Tahoe.....busy days too. (Casey took photos of the guys for Canada, and I was the wrangler...running back and forth) Friday was Casey's graduation from community college too....90 minutes before the show started. I got no rest....woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't get back to sleep for hours....but I was fine. No palpitation episodes at all. I get home , and within 2 hours, the old ticker is jumping all over the place. Why is that?? Could it be because Chris is jumping all over me, not to mention crabbing at Joseph. Yeah, hon, I missed you too. Its so good to be home:/

I had better stop before I say anything more.

Chris is in Illinois this week on a business trip....and Joseph & I are heading back up to Tahoe. The boys playing mostly during the week is pretty convenient;-)

I was a little ticked yesterday. Jesse (Joseph's guitar teacher) called him and said he had another lesson yesterday at 2:30, and could they reschedule. Joseph told him we would be out of town the rest of this week, so he said he would call him back with another time (which he didn't do) Excuse me? Joseph has been taking lessons every Tuesday at 2:30 since February. That is the time on the contract. Why would he have another lesson at that time? (I heard a lady last week bitching about wanting Jesse to teach her kid Tuesday at 2:30) We pay $90 a month for the 4 lessons/month. Why should we be the ones to have to reschedule?? I hope this isn't going to be a frequent thing. I am always the one who accomodates every one else, and I am getting tired of it.

Not Guilty

So, Michael Jackson is free to molest as many boys as he wants now. After all, he isn't guilty of anything. I'm sure, in his sick twisted mind, he will feel vindicated now....and know he 'didn't do anything wrong'.

What a sick fuck.

WHY doesn't one of his people have the balls to say "Michael, sleeping with children is wrong, wrong, wrong!"

Its too bad the parents that pimp their kids out to him can't be arrested and procecuted:/

Ok, rant over.



Joseph and I are headed back to Tahoe tomorrow for a couple of days. I actually like the weekday shows.....the hotels are a hell of a lot cheaper during the week too. I am going to try and rmember my swim suit this time....the pool at the Horizon was just refurbished and it looks great.

Chris is in the middle of working on next year's budget at work, so his mind is totally on work. (Like it isn't usually??) Its a good thing I won't be here;-) It does make me feel better about our budget when he talks about the hundreds of thousands of dollars he has to shave from different places.

It smelled so good this morning when I went outside. I love the smell after a rain. When Joseph was little, he would say it smelled like Oregon outside;-)

Summer rain.....good for the garden, not so good for the clothes I forgot to take off the line last night. Oh well, I'll just consider that an extra rinse, lol

Joseph is finishing up schoolwork today. Tonight we're taking him out for pizza to celebrate the end of 8th grade. He gets his choice of pizza, so it will be pepperoni:/ At least I can have a salad tocut someof the grease from the pepperoni, lol. We asked him what he wanted for 8th grade 'graduation'. He wants a gift card from Tower records........so we got him a $100 gift card, and a $100 gift card from Guitar Center. He will be thrilled! For the rest of his present, he gets to to to Seattle with me then end of July, then up to Vancouver:)

I can't believe my baby is going to be a high schooler in the fall. Even a homeschooling high schooler is in high school :*(

Its A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhod

The weather was almost perfect today.......mid 80s with a slight breeze.

We went over to Petaluma. We hadn't been there in a couple of months. Joseph got to go to Tall Toad Music & then we went to a couple of thrift stores. My deals of the day: a Liz Claiborne skirt w/tags still on for $2.99, and a Brighton purse for $3.99. I also got a very cool dashiki (or is it a kaftan......) to wear to Vacation Bible School. Our theme this year is Serengeti Trek, so I was looking for African inspired things. Anyway, it is very cool.....and it still had original tags on. The Petaluma Goodwill rocks.

After we left there we went to Corte Madera to the Restoration Hardware. Unfortunately, they didn't have what Chris wanted. We hit the Discovery Channel Store and I picked up these Pilates ring thingys for my arms. I looked in the mirror the other day, and I have my mothers upper arms. AAARRRGGGHHH. How the hell did that happen??? Those rings are going to get a workout. My mother's arms will go away:/

I just finished 2 good books. One is Queen Noor's autobiography. I really enjoyed it. She has always facinated me....an American marrying the King of Jordan and becoming Queen.

The other one I finished last night is Nosy Neighbor, by Fern Michaels. It is a good summer read.
Now I need to find something to read tonight.......

We went to Mels Diner for dinner tonight (our Friday night out) then to the Creekwalk to listen to some music. The band was a jazz band......not too bad. It was pretty mellow jazz. We visited with John & Kathy, and Joseph & Derek hung out for a couple of hours. I don't think they appreciated the music as much as the adults;-) Joseph thought it was going to be more like Brian Setzer swing type music, but it wasn't.



Tomorrow is my little brother's birthday. Poor guy.........Kelly is one who 'fell through the cracks' in life:( He was 16 when my mom died......and he needed her then. He really needed my Dad when she died, but he wasn't available....he was having a hard time dealing with her death himself. Kel has always been *slow*. (When he was little, they didn't know about learning disabilities or anything) I think he probably had multiple LDs, knowing what I know now. In school in the late 60s/early 70s however, they didn't really do or know much. He was promoted from grade to grade.....never really learning much. He could barely read, but he kept getting promoted.

When Mom died, my dad just was in no shape to deal with a teenager. He already had brother Geoff who was 20 then and still a no good lazy PITA....and he didn't have the energy for Kelly. Chris and I tried to do what we could, but after a few years, nothing really helped. He ended up dropping out of school, after getting rolled and robbed at school multiple times.

He is and has always been such a kind, vulnerable soul. He has been taken advantage of too much, and, like I said, has fallen through the cracks. I felt guilty for a long time, but I know we did all we could. When Kelly moved in with (crazy PITA) brother Geoff, he was turned on to drugs. Pot would be ok, but not the other shit he started using. Meth is some BAD shit.

Sad thing is.....he was an artist. He could draw/paint anything. If we could have gotten him into some kind of program.......but we didn't.

I haven't even seen him in a few years........he got erratic and I couldn't have that around my family. Like I said, guilt and I got well aquainted.

:*(

Happy birthday, baby brother.

The family reunion turned out to be lots of fun. It was great to reconnect with cousins I haven't seen in a couple of years.......and Dick wasn't one;-) In fact, he was very sweet. I even got a compliment.

It was bittersweet in a way.....remembering all those who used to come, but are no longer with us. .....and knowing that some most likely won't be at the next one.

Rich and Shelley's place is awesome. They moved up a few years ago from Martinez to Penn Valley.....quite a change! They bought a ranch house on about 5 acres.....complete with a barn and swimming pond. It would really be an idyllic place to raise kids. Such freedom those girls have! The house is one with a wraparound porch. That alone made me fall in love with it. He has added to the pond area since we were there last. Now, besides the sand beach he has on one end (he trucks in sand) and the zip line from up the hill (you can either ride the zip line down & land in the water, or land on the other side), he has added a fire pit, with benches all 'round. I think I would live out there during the summer evenings.

Joseph had a good time....either playing with the younger cousins, or hanging out with the early 20 set, playing fusbol and badminton. I am lucky....he relates to all ages.

We didn't spend the night though, like we were going to. Chris ended up getting called out to work, and I didn't want to stay without him. Really, I didn't want to set up the tent/lug everything back and forth from the car;-)

Yesterday we went to the factory outlets here in town. We hardly ever go over there, but they were having a big sidewalk sale. We went to the Haggar store, and Chris ended up getting 2 polos, 2 pair of pants and a pair of shorts. After that we went to the VF outlet, and Chris got a pair of jeans,and 2 more polos, I got a pair of rolled jeans and Joseph got 2 pair of shorts and a pair of jeans.....then I got 2 (mens) tee shirts at Polo Ralph Lauren. (Mens shirts are SO much cheaper than womens) and a pair of baby blue pants and 2 shirts at Ann Taylor. Chris and Joseph really needed what they got....Chris more so. Me, not so much, but I can't pass up a sale;-)

Today, I took Joseph up to Dixon to "jam" with a couple of guys, and Chris did some yard work, then we bbqed a roast and had pasta salad and corn. Yummy:-)

And so, another Memorial weekend draws to a close......

I can't believe how fast this week has gone! It seems I have done nothing but run all week....to and fro, hither and yon. Yon was pretty fun, as was hither;-)

Joseph and I went up to the Scholastic Warehouse Book sale on Tuesday. $50 for $140 worth of books. Not too shabby. I picked up a few books for him to read next fall (holy crap, my baby is going to be a NINTH grader!) along with some for me to read, and a few he wanted for the summer. I took the 9th grade reading list along, but they didn't have any of the listed books. That's ok, I think I probably already have most of them. Black Like Me, The Good Earth and All Quiet On The Western Front are 3 of the listed books. I know I have The Good Earth....I read it again last summer.

I hit both Kohls and Old Navy for clearance sales this week. Lots of adorable tee shirts at Kohls....and I picked Joseph up a pair of jeans for $10 at Old Navy.....along with some track pants for both Chris and me, and a very cute blue floral skirt for me. I think I will wear skirts instead of shorts this summer. They look a lot better on me:/ With the skirts, you can't see that damn cellulite. ICK.

Chris went to the Giants game with Kevin last night.....and got sick on the way home. He tested when he got home, and he wasn't that low......I think it was something he ate. We just don't eat so much junk as we did before, and I don't think his tummy can handle it anymore.

Saturday is the big family reunion........I look forward to seeing most everyone.....but if Dick makes another comment about 'chubby cousin Shelly' I will tell him to go to hell. Back story......I am about 5'7" or so.....and when I was a teenager and a young married, I wore a size 3. I looked anorexic. Now that I am a more normal 10/12......he has the balls to call me chubby? I don't think so:/

Anyway, I am going to Costco tomorrow to pick up some goodies to take along.....and I have to remember to buy more film.

The MRI was clear........so Chris still has no idea why the optic nerve is pale. God, it is so frustrating:/ On top of that, he had 500 laser blasts to his eye today. His frustration level is on red. Not good for him.....or anyone else in the house:(


We did have a nice visit with family (even Holly the perfect) Joseph took his guitar along to Oregon, and he and Roberta entertained us on Thursday night. The boy continues to amaze me....he is really good!

Friday we drove from Oregon to Tahoe.......and I managed to have a good time. My buddies realized what day it was (Peanuts birthday) and kept me laughing all night. I love those guys.

I found out they are going to be at Harrah's almost the whole month of June. Woo hoo! I also found out I will be doing some travelling this summer;-) They will be back at the Paramount in Seattle, and also in Vancouver. YAY!! Road trip!!! (AND.....maybe I will finally be able to meet Denine and Jo Jo!)

Well, the MRI is over......now he waits for the results. He seems a wee bit calmer this evening.

I've been going through pictures this week. Jason emailed and asked for some of his baby pictures and some pictures of Kaya. I don't know if he has any of her......and he damn well should. He is her father:/ Looking through the pictures has brought to the surface lots of feelings and memories. I SO regret believing that bitch over my own son. I know we were going through a rough patch then anyway, but finding out what a liar Kezia is makes me regret believing anything she ever said.

I hadn't looked at Jason's baby pictures in a long time. They are getting faded.....I need to have them restored. I realized lots of things while I was going through them, too. One being that Kaya Michelle is her dad's clone. She looks JUST like Jason did when he was little....only with less hair.

The Peanut has been on my mind more than usual. Her 6th birthday is Friday. Another birthday without the family that adores her. I am thinking of putting a personal ad in the SF paper....just in case any of her mother's friends/family read the paper. Maybe it will piss her off enough to get in touch with us and let us know Kaya is ok. I can't imagine what Kaya thinks......her mother promised to bring her back "in a few days". That was 18 months ago :*(

God, I miss that little girl so damn much, my heart hurts. I still have her Christmas gifts wrapped and waiting for her.......

I'm glad we are going to be gone and busy this weekend....maybe I won't cry so much on Friday.....

Its About Time!

For my throngs of adoring fans.......what you have been clamoring for! A blog update from ME!

I can't believe it has almost been 2 months since I last updated. Why so long? Hell, don't ask me. Just lazy I guess. I *think* about blogging, then get sidetracked. I finally made myself sit down;-)

Let's see........news? I got my tickets for Joseph and me to see Paul McCartney in November. *sigh* Paul.......

I have had the cold from hell......now the cold is almost gone (except for nagging cough) and the oh so loverly allergies have kicked in. My nose is running like a faucet. I should buy stock in Kleenex.

We went and picked up Chris' sister Holly on Saturday and took her down to Santa Cruz to Roy & Eleanors. She told Chris "oh please take me to your house.....don't make me stay with them' Luckily for Chris, she was just kidding.....and even if she weren't, he got out of that. He knows better. Lets just say I am ever so grateful my dear SIL lives ACROSS THE COUNTRY from me. I don't know if our marriage would have survived if she lived closer:/

We're all heading up to Oregon on Wednesday to BIL's house. Thursday is Roy's 80th birthday, and all the kids are going to help celebrate. I still haven't got a gift for him. I have NO clue what to buy.

Tomorrow Chris goes for an MRI. The last visit to the opthamologist wasn't great. He had to have more laser treatment, and his optic nerve in both eyes is pale. I don't know what that means, but it has nothing to do with the diabetes. Doc suspects MS. Chris is scared to death and trying to hide it. I told him that if it is MS.....at least he will know and can begin some treatment. Maybe there is even something they can do about the eyesight. I know THAT scares him...as his mom became blind in the last years of her life....but hers was completely due to diabetes.

I just got back from the doctor.

How can this happen? At my age, and menopausal??????

I'm pregnant.

I am in shock.


I am heading up to Tahoe to see the boys for the weekend.

I really need this now.

*Sigh*














I am kidding.


Not pregnant;-)

April Fools:-)


Ok, I know that was lame, but its the only thing I could think of;-)

Have a great weekend, all.

I will:)

Eyes Wide Open

Is the third time a charm? (I have tried posting twice before....)


The whole title is EYES WIDE OPEN ...The Human Costs of the Iraq War

http://www.afsc.org/eyes


If this exhibit comes anywhere near you....GO SEE IT. I can't stress it enough. See it.


Joseph and I went to Sacramento yesterday to see it. It was the most powerful thing I have ever seen.....even more than the travelling Viet Nam Wall. I am so greatful to the nice man there who supplied tissues......I most definitely needed them. It made my 14 year old son cry too.

It was like a punch in the gut when I first walked up to the display...


There are rows upon rows of combat boots....each representing a man or woman who has been killed in Iraq. Too many boots...and more to come:-(


There are also civilian shoes of all kinds....representing some of the Iraqis who have been killed. There are everything from baby booties to work boots.....and everything in between. It was the one pair of tiny baby booties with a tag attached that said *Newborn baby....no name* that did me in.

I ran into Cindy Sheehan. Her son Casey, was killed a year ago Monday......

Cindy was the one who requited me to teach CCD all those years ago when Joseph was a "curly haired little boy" (her words). Listening to her talk about her son...and to see her straightening his boots so lovingly......broke my heart. She introduced Joseph and me to a woman named Karen...a woman who lost her only child in Iraq. Her. Only. Child. I cannot begin to imagine. Karen told me she is going to be an honorary grandma to any Sheehan babies, since she won't ever have grandbabies of her own:*(

It was a hard day...but one I am so glad Joseph and I went to together.

Like I said before.....go see this if you can. No matter who you feel about this f*cking war, it will affect you. (And I think you know how I feel about the war...)

Tuesday, Tuesday

Its Tuesday, but it feels like a Monday. It is also day 51 of non stop work for Chris. 51 days without a day off. Damn, I didn't realise it was that long already:/ He is just exausted. He still has no idea when he will get the unit back either. Our Disneyland trip may have to be postponed. We were going the week after Easter, but may have to put it off for another week or two. Good thing Ihaven't made reservations yet.

Today was the day for errand running. I ran to Dollar Tree to pick up some stuff for CCD, then to Target to buy The Incredibles, and a refill card for the Tracfone. How then did I manage to spend almost $70? Damn Target sales anyway;)

Joseph had guitar lessons at 2:30, then I taught CCD at 3:30. It was our last class before Easter, so we had sweets for the kiddoes and I had a bunch of projects for them to choose from.


The Weekend

This weekend, while Chris was busting his ass at work, Joseph and I went up to Tahoe for opening weekend for the boys at Harrahs. It was all around a great weekend. I got some news from Casey that warmed my heart:-)

I also got hit on. In front of my son. The guy was an idiot. ...with a capital I. He and his friend were backstage....he is a friend of JB.....although when JB heard what he did, he said the guy will not be back. Casey, Joseph and I were standing in the hall outside the green room, and he walks over, stands in front of me (too close in front....) and says, "let me guess...(pointing at me, then Casey, then Joseph) sister, sister, brother" Um, no. I toldh im, mother, son, friend, then he says (OK, hold the laughter please) "Well, you don't look a day over 24" ROFLMAO ( I can laugh) I just smiled and thanked him. 24??? Puhleeze. I know I don't look my age, but I sure as hell don't look more than HALF my age.

He said some other crap that I tried to ignore, and kept touching my arm. *shudder* He also was hitting on Casey, which is much more understandable. We finally went and 'hid' in Steve's dressing room. We kind of told Steve what was going on, but not detailed until we all left. Joey already didn't like the guy and was pretty much hiding out in his dressing room. El creepo and his friend left a few minutes before we all did.....most likely to the bar upstairs (like he needed another drink) I was glad he wasn't in the parking lot. I would have made someone walk Joseph and me to my car......

When Joey heard what creepo had been doing, he was livid. I think he would have kicked some ass if he had seen the guy.


Anyway,hopefully creep won't be back....at least backstage. Booboo and I are going back up on Friday.........and I may be able to meet a forum friend:-) Denise and her hubby are going to Reno.......I am trying to talk her into driving over for the show.

Miranda Update

I mentioned Miranda the other day......the young daughter of an online friend of mine. The one with a brain tumor.....an inoperable one

Her mom updated today.

Miranda has a glioblastoma. Glioblastoma is what Jimmy R died from a few years ago. I have been sitting here sobbing. I can't imagine what it is like to know just how sick your child is. There is only a 15-20% chance she will make it a year. She said Miranda already is getting wheelchair, and is telling her what kind of wig she wants.


This girl needs a miracle, everyone.

Miranda Update

I mentioned Miranda the other day......the young daughter of an online friend of mine. The one with a brain tumor.....an inoperable one

Her mom updated today.

Miranda has a glioblastoma. Glioblastoma is what Jimmy R died from a few years ago. I have been sitting here sobbing. I can't imagine what it is like to know just how sick your child is. There is only a 15-20% chance she will make it a year. She said Miranda already is getting wheelchair, and is telling her what kind of wig she wants.


This girl needs a miracle, everyone.

Joseph won 4 tickets to this weekend's boat show in Sacramento.

He was listening to the radio while he did his school work, and there was a trivia question. "What was the name of the guitar Eric Clapton used on the song Layla" I guess they meant what he called it. *Shrug* Anyway, this guy calls in and said it was Blackie. They told him he was right, and he won. My son looks at me and says, "MOM THAT IS WRONG!" I laughed and asked him what the correct answer is. Brownie. That is the correct answer;-)

Anyway, I told him to email the station and let them know, so he did;) The DJ emailed him back, told him he was right and that there will be 4 tickets at the ticket booth for the boat show. Pretty cool, lol. I hope we can leave early enough to go before we head up to Tahoe.


My son, the music trivia freak;-)

I love Kohls. (Not as much as I love my new Dyson, but close, lol) I especially love their clearance sales. Especially when the sale is 80-90% off regular price. I love great deals.

I went into Kohls on Friday morning to get a new griddle. I didn't get the griddle, but only because I couldn't carry it alng with the other great deals I got.

Here are the great deals:)

black leather knee high boots
black dress heels
1 wool newsboy cap that either Joseph or I can wear
pair of socks
khaki pants for me
pair of jeans for Joseph
blue pullover sweater
red cardigan
black cashmere sweater (pullover)
2 pair of knit gloves (red and black)
2 pair of earrings
set of nail polish/lip gloss

Grand total: $44.61

The boots alone were reguarly $99, and the cashmere was $78. Dayum.

There were so many great deals, I had to go back last night to pick up the griddle.....along with 2 more pair of shoes for $3.oo each. Did I mention I am a shoe whore? Imelda Marcos has nothin on my shoe closet

Sadness......

An online friend of mine lost her Dad yesterday. Cancer, that evil awful thing. He was diagnosed only a few weeks ago. Thank God she was able to be with him the few days before he passed. I'm so sorry Tiff. I have been where you are now, and it sucks. I send you hugs.

Another online friend is in need of prayers too. Actually, her daughter is the one in need. Her name is Miranda.....and she was just diagnosed with a large mass in her brain. She is only a teenager. She will undergo a biopsy on Monday to see just what is going on..........

If you are a praying person, then pray. Pray for Miranda, and pray for her family. I can't begin to imagine how scary this is for her and her family.

Hug your kids and tell them how much you love them. Call your parents (if they are still here) and tell them you love them. Thank them for all they have done for you.

Don't let another day pass without telling you friends and family how much they mean to you:)

Yes, I am feeling very melancholy after all this. I wish I could just make it all better for my friends. But. I. Can't.